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the year in review: 2006
1. What did you do in 2006 that you'd never done before?
make Filipino food without the help of my mother, live in a house with other people my age (I’ve always either been in the dorms or by myself), drink in a bar legally (or drink legally in general), be part of a wedding party/bring a significant other to a major family event (BIG big mistake)
2. Did you keep your New Year's resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
eh, that’s debatable… then again, I don’t think I made concrete resolutions this year.
3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
no, although I do have friends at home that have either conceived or have gotten engaged (which is a good first step to conception/birth!)
4. Did anyone close to you die?
thankfully, no. however, I have witnessed good friends dealing with the death of close ones, which is just as heartwrenching.
5. What countries did you visit?
Canada. Does that even count?
6. What would you like to have in 2007 that you lacked in 2006?
This is going to sound really really cheesy and pathetic of me, but happiness. Looking back, was I truly that happy? Or was I just convincing myself that I was happy because of my “situation”? To be more specific, I think I want that sense/piece of mind that I had in 2005. I want to be like that again.
7. What date from 2006 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
September 16, 2006. I haven’t been the same since, and not in a good way either.
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
It’s been a pretty uneventful year, to be perfectly honest… I can’t even think of anything.
9. What was your biggest failure?
Jeff. I’ll leave it at that.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
I had mono in mid-March, and some sort of weird intestinal thing in October.
11. What was the best thing you bought?
My new IPod. 11gigs out of 30 filled, and it still is very hungry. Hehe.
12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Brigid, Alex, Aditi, Clymer, Krystle, Aaron, Alice, Brett, my MPA’s and my CZ staff. The second half of the year has been amazingly long and hard, but these people have made it easier. In some way shape or form, these people have helped me start to rebuild and help me start to realize the old me, and I will forever be in gratitude for it.
13. Whose behavior made you appalled?
see answer #9.
14. Where did most of your money go?
rent, gas, food, clothes, barhopping… I really should watch myself more next year.
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
wow… I really didn’t get excited over much this year at all. There wasn’t anything particularly memorable that happened, and that is kind of depressing to me. Errrgh, more and more I’m realizing that 2006 was an absolutely huge waste.
16. What song will always remind you of 2006?
“Your Ex-Lover is Dead” by Stars. Download it, or perhaps the song title speaks for itself.
17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or sadder? Sadder, unfortunately. However, I take baby steps every single day to make sure that I’m better than I had been the day before. I’ll be back to good in due time.
ii. thinner or fatter? Errrgh, stress and coping tend to make me heavier. I’m gonna have to do something about that this upcoming year.
iii. richer or poorer? Considering I now have cashflow, I guess I’m richer.
18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Spending time with my family or my friends. I felt like I got distant from everyone in my life this year, and that just isn’t a good thing at all. Hopefully this last semester will give me the chance to really rekindle all of those relationships.
19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Being accommodating, understanding and caring concerning what I considered my year’s failure. We see where it brought me, and perhaps I should’ve just let it go just as easily.
20. How did you spend Christmas?
It was extremely low-key… I couldn’t make it to family Christmas because I had to work when we it was held. I did get to see the families on Christmas Eve morning and went to mass/breakfast.
apparently there is no 21
22. Did you fall in love in 2006?
No, I fell out of love instead.
23. How many one-night stands?
Heh… I don’t kiss and tell. ;-)
24. What was your favorite TV program?
It’s a toss-up between Grey’s Anatomy, America’s Next Top Model, and Project Runway.
25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Hate is a really strong word, but I guess I do… I can vacillate between hate and other feelings, right?
26. What was the best book you read?
I only read three books this year: On the Road, The Good Earth, and the Art of War. I like all three of them though.
27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
I hate to admit this, but I love Justin Timberlake’s new album. Every single that has come off of FS/LS has been amazing, and he’s actually kind of attractive to me now. LOL!
28. What did you want and get?
My IPod and a good GRE score
29. What did you want and not get?
My desired MCAT score
30. What was your favorite film of this year?
I didn’t really watch any movies this year. Wow… I really made a waste of this year.
31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
the big 21. it was extremely uneventful, so I decided to hold a 21.5 birthday party with my friend Diana on December 8th. I barhopped with a bunch of good friends and ended up at the Necto. Absolutely fun times with amazing people!
32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Not having to deal with such a messy break-up.
33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2006?
My wardrobe is basically taken from a Banana Republic or GAP catalogue. Solid tops, boot cut jeans, loafers with argyle socks.
34. What kept you sane?
Heh… it is debatable if I was sane by the end of the year. But, I guess my friends and family kept me from spiraling out of control.
35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Justin Timberlake. Yeah, feel free to laugh at me now.
36. What political issue stirred you?
PROPOSAL 2! It was so hard to educate residents in Couzens about it without being too biased (I couldn’t take an official stance because of my position as an MPA), but I think I did a good job of getting awareness of the proposal out there. Although the result wasn’t something I desired, I know I did what I could.
37. Who did you miss?
Honestly, the one person I truly miss is me. I haven’t felt like myself in a long time, and I want “Drew” to come back.
38. Who was the best new person you met?
My ResStaffs, both in CZ and MPA staffs. Ya’ll are absolutely amazing!
39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2006:
Rely only on yourself; always be on the lookout for that wolf in sheep’s clothing.
40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
Sometimes you'll laugh
Sometimes you'll cry
Life never tells us
The when's or why's
When you've got friends to wish you well
You'll find a point when
You will exhale (yeah, yeah, say)
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Thanks, wifey... Once you are tagged you MUST write an entry about 6 weird habits/things you do/odd information, as well as state this rule clearly. In the end, you need to choose the next six people to be tagged and list their names. 1. I have a system of ordering items of the conveyor belt of the checkout station at the supermarket. In my head, I feel this is a good way for the cashier/baggers to put the items in the bags the way I would like them. 2. If ever a guest is over, I make sure that they are fed (I guess this isn't so weird if you are Filipino.) 3. The first time I ever had escargot was in a Pizza Hut... in Beijing. 4. On my iTunes list, all the genres for my songs are labeled as "Music" or "Not Music". Anything that is not labeled as such is a song that I haven't either fixed the "Get Info" box for and/or I had just downloaded. 5. Whenever I karaoke in public, I HAVE to sing "My Sharona". 6. Back in high school, I recorded an album with three of my friends. Our band name was "Aavaante Gaarde" and the album was entitled "Don't Ask". If you would like an MP3 of our music, please e-mail me. I tag three LJ-users: ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif?v=92.1) akc09, mamamania, and nine_hearts. I tag one blogspot-er, Princess BlogonokeAnd I tag two non-bloggers... Jeffy and Rhiannon. and ya'll thought i might've had an entry of substance. ;-) perhaps later today when i'm actually awake?
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i'm currently in the UGLI bumming on the library computers. still on the job search, still internetless... but i'm quite content for the most part, and i think this will prove to be an awesome summer.
in the meantime, here's a useless profile meme i found while sifting through random LJ's. enjoy! hehe.
10 YEARS AGO I WAS:
10, almost 11. Last few days of sixth grade. Don't remember much from those days at all... Middle school really wasn't that memorable for me.
5 YEARS AGO I WAS:
15, almost 16... absolutely psyched to go to SI camp in a month and for my driver's license. lost a lot of weight that year due to running every day and eating only a cheese sandwich with water for lunch every day. also went to my first prom with a german foreign exchange student. hated high school with a passion.
1 YEAR AGO I WAS:
19, still adjusting to life in Caro after what was quite a successful sophomore year at the University of Michigan. happy not to have the stress of academics and genAPA, however. used the time to get ready for upcoming GIEU trip to China or for watching endless amounts of filipino channel at home.
YESTERDAY I:
woke up and made myself a cheese/ham/turkey sandwich, went to class and listened to my prof drone on about monks and monasteries, drove to the mall immediately after class for a job interview at the Banana Republic (in which I got myself a second interview for next week... hotness!), came back home and promptly laid in bed thinking about whether or not I should go work out, decided to go to the CCRB after much lazing around with the housemates, ellipticalled for 30 minutes and came back to the house to make spam and rice (mmmmmmmm....), watched "House" with the roomies before retiring to do more P-chem problems, talked on the phone to my beloved Jeffy for about an hour before falling asleep.
5 FOODS I ENJOY:
1. Sushi
2. Mu-shu Pork
3. anything from White Castle
4. the Shish Combo for two from La Shish
5. my mother's cooking
5 SONGS I KNOW ALL THE WORDS TO:
1. "Clocks" by Coldplay
2. "Such Great Heights" by the Postal Service
3. "Let Go" by Frou Frou
4. "Enjoy the Silence" by Depeche Mode
5. "Just Like Heaven" by the Cure
5 THINGS I WOULD DO WITH 100 MILLION DOLLARS:
1. Put away $50,000,000 for a rainy day fund.
2. Buy my parents all those nice things they've always wanted.
3. Buy a lot of expensive electronic toys and gadgets. :-D
4. Travel the world, twice.
5. Pay off any outstanding debts or loans.
5 PLACES I WOULD RUN AWAY TO!
1. the Pacific Northwest
2. the Philippines
3. New Zealand
4. Toronto, ON
5. Beijing, China
5 THINGS I WOULD NEVER WEAR:
1. Pleather
2. Jean Jackets
3. Tapered-leg jeans
4. Animal fur
5. anything with "Ohio State", "Notre Dame", or "MSU" emblazoned on it
5 FAVORITE TV SHOWS:
1. Friends
2. Grey's Anatomy
3. America's Next Top Model
4. House, M.D.
5. What Not to Wear/How Do I Look? (the shows are interchangeable)
5 BAD HABITS:
1. Napping excessively
2. Not cleaning up after myself
3. Spending too much time on Facebook/Myspace
4. Being too extreme/never finding a happy medium
5. Being overly distrustful
5 BIGGEST JOYS:
1. Jeffy
2. Being outdoors (walking the Arb, rollerblading at Gallup Park, etc...)
3. Eating good food, especially if it's homemade.
4. Travelling to new places and discovering things I've never seen before.
5. Playing with my nieces/nephews and/or hanging out with my family.
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another round of midterms, yet again feeling a bit uneasy. i'm really getting horrifically burnt out, and i really need out... out of ann arbor, away from everything. home wouldn't be such a bad idea right now, but i have so much to get squared away here. i just wish i could just snap my fingers and make everything go away, but that's impossible. instead, i type in my livejournal and watch grey's anatomy DVD's.
i'm just so worried about doing well and it seems like i'm just missing opportunities left and right. i'll study for days on end for exams where i just end up freaking out. god knows what will happen once MCAT's roll around. i hear my peers talk about the incredulous amounts of studying for the test they do, and i just feel so incompetent. no matter how much reading or studying or sequestering i do, i just feel like it's not enough... not a good way of going about things, i suppose.
i guess i just want to know that everything will be ok. i want to know that i'll get into a track that will bring me into UMich's med school or that i get in someplace respectable. if i have to get my MPH first, i'll do it. i hate this uncertainty... not knowing whether what i've done is enough or not. i hate not being on top of my game, and there's just so little time left.
wow... in less than 5 weeks, i'll be out of east quad. funny how time flies so fast. i don't remember it going by at all. also, my five-monther with jeff was saturday. didn't see that one coming (in terms of how fast it came up, not in the sense that i didn't see myself with him for that long) and frankly it doesn't seem like it's been that long. it's going to be weird not having him just a hop, skip and jump away come the spring and summer semester.
i don't know right now... i'm just so uncertain about everything... i just wish there were answers somewhere, but i guess that's just the way life goes.
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and now for my semi-monthly update...
as soon as i step foot back into ann arbor, i will have to step up my game about 10-fold. this first half of the semester went decently (sans biochem test), but there is A LOT to do before the end of april. i know that a lot of people are in my situation right now, so i'm gonna try not to complain about it too much. just kind of sucks that i'll be in a perpetual state of stress and anxiety. all in all though, i know what i have to do, and i have to push through it as much as i don't want to. anything to get that A in biochem and to beat my darling redhead on the MCATs. :-D
speaking of the redhead...
last i updated, i had alluded to some troubles in that realm. things are infintely much better than last updating, albeit with a little bit of "healing and rebuilding" along the way. i must say though, it really tested my tolerance and my ability to think rationally, but we definitely weathered the storm. i don't want to go into many details, but if you really must know, just ask.
i ended up going on spring break with jeff to toronto, hosteling, eating, and boozing it up. i must say, it was an interesting experience; nice place to visit, but there were just too many little things about canada that would prevent me from ever living there (i guess i'll be stuck living in massachusetts then). not a huge fan of the incessant taxes nor the lack of liquor stores. also, it didn't help that temps were down below freezing every day, so walking around town proved to be extra tedious. however, toronto is quite charming; the subway system proved useful and was clean and i especially loved the fact that there was a ma-and-pa filipino restaurant right next to the gay district. also, jeff proved to be quite a wonderful travel buddy. i dont' think i would've been able to take walking out in the cold for long periods of time with anyone else.
i'll put pictures up later, but i'm lazy.
i also got my hands on grey's anatomy season 1. i figure if i can't get into med school, at least i can watch people go through the motions. hehe.
time to eat.
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instead of doing biochem, i did this... hehe. enjoy!
9 lasts.
last cigarette: huh?
last beverage: diet pepsi. it's one of only two things i ever drink (the other being water.)
Last kiss: about an hour ago... jeff kissed me a good morning before going off to class. :-D
last movie seen: motorcycle diaries
last phone call: jeff
last cd played: my workout mix (it just happens to be what's in my player... i haven't worked out in two weeks. *gasp*)
last bubble bath: during that summer between my freshman and sophomore year, so that would've made it summer 2004?
last time you cried: i like to pretend that i don't have tear ducts.
8 have you evers.
have you ever dated one of your best friends: i would say that jeff is one of my best friends, so i guess yeah.
have you ever skinny dipped: surprisingly, no. although, it seems like it would be fun. ;-)
have you ever kissed somebody and regretted it: yeah, in hindsight.
have you ever fallen in love: hehe, yep. blissfully in love. :-D
have you ever lost someone you loved: a lover? no. someone who i care a lot about? yes.
have you ever been depressed: nope.
have you ever been drunk and threw up: heh, isn't it a required activity in college? hehe.
7 states you've been to:
California, Texas, New York, Florida, Oregon, Illinois, Ohio
6 things you've done today.
1. woke up
2. promptly cuddled into jeff and fell back to sleep again
3. woke up again and tried to unsuccessfully persuade said redhead into skipping class (i'm a bad influence. LOL!)
4. fell asleep again
5. woke up again and sat at the computer to check news
6. pretend to study for my biochem test on tuesday
5 favorites in no order.
1. travelling to exotic locales
2. having conversations with the patients at the VA hospital
3. playing the piano
4. dancing (be it at the club or doing something choreographed.)
5. any time spent with the redhead and/or my party crew
4 people you can tell [almost] anything to.
1. jeff
2. [otherwise i don't
3. really tell anyone
4. too much at all.]
3 wishes.
1. get into med school... stanford med if at all possible (it's a wish, right? heh.)
2. amass enough money magically so jeffy and i could just lounge around on some beach all day long.
3. win an olympic gold medal (hey, the oly's begin today. one can dream, right? hehe.)
2 things you want to do before you die.
1. do a mission with doctors without borders
2. do a triathalon
1 thing you regret.
1. anytime i thought i was in love before now. i didn't know what the hell i was thinking back then.
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i love my boyfriend. if not, just for the the fact that the boy will eat a whole white castle crave case with me and proceed to start farting all over the place because he feels that damn comfortable about it. hehe, that's definitely something ya'll didn't need to know, but i find it strangely endearing. seriously though, i've found myself a good one. i can't begin to talk about how much i thank the big guy up there for bringing him and i together. on a more sobering note, this is an article of an APIA hate crime, the brutal slaying of thien minh ly, in which sunday will mark the 10th anniversary of this man's death. i'm not going to rehash the details, you can click the link yourself. however, pay close attention to the alleged letters written by the killers. even though it's been 10 years since this crime, i wonder if the social climate still allows for this to happen? i heard a voice recording of the letter excerpts at the boxes and walls museum up on north campus yesterday, and i remember thinking, "oh god, could this be me?" will ever be a time when, even only in the back of mind, i won't have to worry about something like that to happen? one would only hope so. heh, nevermind. i don't feel like going into a whole diatribe. where in the hell is the snow, damnit? LOL! i wanna go sledding with my damn lunch trays!!! :-D
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22 days. this is how long it has taken for me to feel the effects of being over-extended. i'm thinking this is about the right time for this to happen, although it's still quite a depressing feeling. and the weird part about it all is that i think i've got a pretty decent balance of overworking myself and still having time to breathe.
ever get into those days where you are just loopy? like, the type of loopy where you feel borderline intoxicated even though you clearly haven't ingested alcohol in a long period of time? it's such an odd funk that i've been in today, really. i've either said really off-color things to the people i'll be around or have acted utterly silly in inappropriate places. hopefully i'll snap out of it.
then again, it's a monday. 10 to 10 straight classes, meetings, and office hours. not to mention, i still have this premonition that i need to go elliptical until my legs fall off. i was looking at a picture that a friend of mine had added to their facebook album, and i was thinking, "gahdamnit, i didn't realize that someone decided to inject 3248920482 pounds of fat onto my face." hence, the excessive ellipticalling tonight. gotta do what you gotta do, i suppose.
i think i also lost my MCAT gen chem flashcards. i know that seems like something trivial to be semi-upset about, but i feel like they're my crib sheets. hopefully the kaplan people will send me a new set. speaking of getting shit sent, where the hell is my freaking biochem book? i clearly ordered it about 2.5 weeks ago, and i still haven't gotten it. bahhh...
i've been whining too much. i apologize kids. i promise my life really isn't this melodramatic. isn't it during times of some sort of emotional extreme where we are the most expressive anyway?
offhand, "jane says" by jane's addiction is a great song. go listen to it. NOW.
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i find myself at the media union tonight. originally this was a way to force myself to actually do work while in front of a computer. somehow, i felt that if i was dicking around on livejournal or facebook here, i'd feel bad that i was taking up computers from other more worthy enginerds. however, everyone around me seems to be playing online card games or reading chinese news. hence why i am typing out this entry instead of poring over my MCAT stuff. the semester has definitely kicked into full swing now. i definitely find myself perpetually tired all the time, and i think the only saving grace that i have is seeing jeffy in some way shape of form each day (heh, come to think of it, the last time that i DIDN'T see him was last tuesday. wow.) schoolwork is starting to pile up, but it seems like i am on top of my game right now; i smoked my first biochem quiz and my polsci response paper was a walk in the park. unfortunately, i haven't gotten as much MCAT studying done as i have wanted, though it seems that people who are taking actual classroom courses are around the same subject material as i am right now. i also started volunteering at the veterans' hospital up on north campus. i'll be playing piano/singing to the vets and then i help out with the nightly bingo games that happen after dinner. luckily this isn't a huge committment, only twice/three times a month. however, i'm really happy to be playing piano again, not to mention that i'm getting some hospital volunteer work done. the vets seem like some pretty cool people, and i'm really looking forward to interacting with them. although, i find myself at a loss as to what to play. readers, if you could recommend me things to play for the vets, taht would be awesome. also, i found another reason why i want to end up in oregon when i'm older: 94/7 FM, a:pdx. it always makes me happy to find great alt-rock stations around (as passe as the label has become.) anyone who plays remixes of early 90's depeche mode during (what would have been) rushhour definitely makes a listener out of me. blargh... it amazes me at how little i have to talk about at a given time. this is precisely why i've updated no more than 2-3 times a month now.
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this semester seems like it will either be my best semester or my worst semester, depending on what footing i get myself into after this first month. academic work seems pretty manageable; other than biochem, my classes don't seem too terribly hard. such a good scenario to see myself into considering that this MCAT coursework definitely beckons for my undivided attention. i find myself extremely freaked out already about april and this anxiety seems to grow day by day. maybe i'm just overreacting a little bit, but i think i've gotten myself so hellbent on doing so unhumanly stellar that no amount of studying i feel i can do will satiate that need for success. *sigh* what the hell am i doing considering med school sometimes? on one hand, i can't see myself doing anything else; it's been the plan since day one and it definitely will give me some sense of stability when i'm all done. on the other hand, i guess i also have this need to delve deeper, investigate further, and really explore... i don't know really what i mean by that, but more and more i find myself getting interested more in the "human experience", the knowledge learned by interacting with people, wandering around aimlessly until i reach some sort of self-determined conclusion... then go to med school. i've always had this premonition in my mind, i suppose, but i think because it seems like that time is here to figure things out, these thoughts are really coming to a head.
i really have no idea what i'm trying to say... do i ever really know what i'm trying to say in this thing anymore? it's amazing that i've had a run with you so long, livejournal.
definitely though, i do have things in my head that i need to sort through. i found myself breaking down last night, and i realized that there are some issues that i've tabled that i suppose i should resolve soon. out of that, the prevailing question i found myself asking was, "do i compromise my expectations and values too easily?" i've always thought myself as a pretty tolerant person, but also i've always had clear cut expectations of people, especially those i care about deeply. while i realize that perfection is never going to be fulfilled, i wonder how much of myself i feel like i have to compromise of myself or to what extent am i going against everything i believe or had held dear to me because of some unexplainable force or reason. this lack of control in this sense scares me and i wish i had the mind to see things as solely black and white on everything. for most of the college experience, i feel like i've been able to stick to my guns and affirm why i believe the way i believe; in some instances it took having to get away to realize there was an ensuing void. however, why now am i finding myself questioning everything, thinking that my opinions might not be as valid or my views cockneyed? for the most part, i know that i am a strong person, or at least that i'm capable of being strong. i guess i'm just scared that i've increasingly become weaker and weaker, and i've just kind of let it go unchecked.
then again, what in the hell is strength measured by anyway? is it by the rationale one uses to deal with emotional outbursts like these, or the ability to work with what i am feeling? i don't know...
this has become extremely verbose, and i'm sorry that i've subjected ya'll to this... i really need to to start writing in this thing more often, preferably during times when i'm not in some sort of emotional extreme.
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so i guess i'm updating my livejournal. yeah. an update that isn't in the form of a profile or something that professes my love for jeff. surprised, eh? but i guess i should put something up here, especially when i get IM's from bampote telling me to get back online for the sheer purpose of commenting on blog entries. ;-) LOL! no, seriously though... to sum up the rest of the semester... somehow i ended up with my best semester GPA but i'm still freaking out about med school, they've kept me as an MPAA but i'm being moved to couzens next year (the hill? gahh), i've realized i'm pretty much reduced to an unorganized bumbling mess when i'm not running my life with my planner, and i think i've spent more time with jeff than i have with the rest of my friends combined (not that this is a bad thing, and in fact i quite enjoy my time with him.) break ended up being quite slow and relaxing. christmas was spent sans jo and the family, but it was nice; jim, will, lorna and i ended up making our yearly mecca to the brentwood after to engage in bowling and pitchers of miller lite. laura and i went karaoke-ing at the crappy two days later, and i engaed in a little bit more drunken debauchery; i think i might have gotten hit on by one of the drunken older women, but i don't remember too much. and new year's was spent with jeff coming up to caro; it was an absolutely amazing time, and it was nice to ring in a new year with someone. other than these activities, i mainly spent my time sleeping or watching TV. i must say, it's interesting switching modes for a little bit like that; i guess i've gotten used to having a laundry list of items to do each day that i get pre-emptively paranoid that i don't have something over my head. what the hell is wrong with me? on that note though, break was way too short. 10 days is not nearly enough to recover from a semester, really. i have to leave tomorrow for ann arbor, and honestly i'm not looking too forward to it. i'm not ready to get back to the grindstone or get annoyed at my hall for being obnoxiously loud in the wee hours of the morning on a weekday. this semester should prove to be quite a tough one; i'll be attempting to balance 16 credits, an MCAT online course (with MCAT's looming in april), and making sure FASA and MPAA'ing do not go down the shitter. hopefully my sanity will stay intact by the end of april... i just have to remember to keep things in perspective and not bog myself down with too much (ha!) and for this, my new year's resolution for the year: work hard so that i can do well on the MCAT's and raise my GPA. there we go... one, two, three... go drew.
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